Here’s my take on it. Often we set up a hierarchy of priorities in our life. We say God comes first, family second, work third et cetera. You get the idea. Now don’t brand me a heretic for this but it seems to me that if God comes first, it implies that the possibility exists He could drop to second, or third, giving way to my putting other items on my agenda ahead of Him. And, therein lies the compartmentalization of God. God should not come first. God should be over all, well above the vagaries of first, second, third or fourth.

Sound like a sermon you’ve heard? Perhaps, but not likely. Wondering what in the world it has got to do with stress? Everything. Here’s how the questionable reasoning works. I develop the hierarchy, which has God in first place. Family is second. Somewhere down the line is me personally and all I have been given to be my best – relaxation, exercise, quiet, renewal. Obviously that is lesser than God and the things that I am doing “for” Him. Therefore when the need arises for such things around me, I will not follow up on them because the work “for” God is of greater importance, being connected with His name.

What have we done? We have compartmentalized God. We have separated Him and the legitimate and healthy care of people (and me), by several degrees. One is over the other. The other must be of lesser, if not little to any importance. The result, stress, overload and burnout, not being at our best to be available for and effective in those things that we feel passionate about.

The solution? Put God in His rightful place over all. Whatever first, God over that. Whatever second, God over that. Personal care (?) third, God over that. I don’t know what order you would place things in, but placing God over all avoids two extremes. One, we are less likely to misinterpret and say, “No matter what my family or personal needs are, I will ..” or “I am too busy being important and doing important things to care for myself (or allow God to care for me). Second, we are less likely to go to the other extreme and say, “I will forget about other things now. I have to care about me.”

To quote the Bible in this, “God over all, forever praised.” God over all; for some of you, perhaps it a time who’s insight has come.

As 2012 looks us square in the face, we are challenged with many obstacles as leaders in both our personal and professional lives. In their classic book, “The Leadership Challenge,” James Kouzes and Barry Posner encourage us to look back before looking ahead. They write when we first gaze into our past, we elongate our future. We enrich our future and give it details as we recall the richness of our past experiences.

With that in mind, here’s a brief look at leadership lessons I learned in 2011 and a focused approach for 2012.

• Do the hard thing. What does that look like for you? Switching jobs, firing a “C” player on your team, setting new boundaries with relationships that drain you, or maybe pressing the reset button on your marriage?  I did several of the aforementioned and started my own company in 2011 during an economic recession in Southwest Florida and also made some necessary, but difficult decisions in my marriage to win back my wife.
• Be accountable and teachable. One of the traps we fall into as leaders is the tendency to lose our ability to listen and receive instruction. We are looked to for the answers. Be the decision-makers. That’s how we’re wired. I have chosen to surround myself with several men who I’ve given permission to speak into my life both personally and professionally when they see things I am missing. It has helped me immensely in making decisions about business, marriage and family issues, spiritual matters and the like.
• Learn to connect with your family. Yes, I know the saying that our families need our “quality time.” I have learned this year that really means connect with my kids and my wife in the way they desire. With 4 kids, that becomes a difficult charge! I bring them on errands with me, turn off the laptop (fill in the media device here) to be present with them, laugh with them and listen to them. I took my 15-year-old son out for lunch during school on a workday which shocked him. I simply asked, “Are you happy?” It opened up a bright and colorful conversation and after 20 minutes we had truly connected. Try it with your family!

So, what’s ahead in 2012? Start with what matters most to you. What are your values? Mine are Family, God’s will, Hope, Accomplishment and Purpose. Next, plan to step away from the daily grind of emails, phone calls, financials, troubleshooting problems and find a place to think, pray, reflect and write. Start with 2-3 hours and work your way up to half or full days away. I will typically sense a word or two that becomes a theme for my upcoming year like Serve, Purpose or Focus. This coming year the word is Growth. The key is solitude-get away to reflect back and plan ahead. All the best in 2012!

Doug Poll is a Certified Professional Life Coach (CPLC) at his company called The Doug Poll Group. They specialize in coaching executives and leaders and also work with non-profit clients helping them raise money through a unique turn-key golf marathon event. He can be reached at doug@dougpollgroup.com or on his LinkedIn profile as well.

Where do you find them? Everywhere. In responsible public office. Running a store. Heading up a service company. Managing sensitive data. Navigating the boardroom. Flying the globe. Everywhere. You may be one of them.

Many alcoholics deny they have a problem. They loudly proclaim that they are in perfect control. But to everyone else the opposite is apparent. At times and in certain situations they seem to do a good job of cover up. But you can be sure somebody is suffering because of their behavior … including themselves.

Let’s be personal. That individual struggling with alcohol may be … you … It’s a huge and growing problem and in fact the alcohol controls you. Those around you all know it. You’re the only one denying it.

So if by some strange chance this simple post is a wake up call for … you … please seek help. This is not something you can solve on your own. Perhaps some of these steps will be of some assistance.

• Tell the truth. You’ve lied for long enough. You are the one who is drinking. It is your problem to solve. Alcohol controls you, not the other way round.

• Don’t lay blame, refusing to do anything about your problem because you are so busy blaming others for something. It’s an excuse. Only you can do something about you.

• Determine to do whatever it will take to solve this problem and nothing short of whatever it will take.

• Get to the bottom of it. You started drinking heavily for a reason. You must get back to causes, facing them head on, examining them carefully and taking action needed to put them to rest once and for all.

• Reach out to those who love you and care for you. Allow them to be your support structure as you do the work needed to beat alcoholism. Tell them the truth … always.

• Reach out to experts and organizations that can help. Alcoholics Anonymous comes to mind. There are others as well. They’ve been helping people dealing with this problem for a long time. You’ll find people who care and have expertise.

• Don’t assume that people will not respect you because you reveal you have a problem with alcohol. Assumptions stop far too many people from doing what’s needed. In fact people will probably admire you for the steps you are taking to find solutions.

Please, take action today. Be willing to do whatever it will take to put this struggle with alcohol behind you. We need you at your best in your home, in your business and as you lead in our communities and country.

If you wish to understand how to be the best you can be you must understand how to reach for excellence. That’s where it starts. You must have a hunger for excellence … what I like to refer to as an attitude of excellence.

That’s why, at least as a starting point, you may be your own best success coach. The desire starts with you. It can’t be artificially imported from the outside. The desire, the hunger drives you forward.

By excellence I do not mean perfection. We will not reach that this side of heaven. But we can reach to be our very best, personally and professionally. We can reach for our companies and organizations, our committees and teams to be the best they can be. That reaching is moving forward with an attitude of excellence.

An attitude of excellence is a driving knowledge that we have the capacity to do even better, that we have been created with incredible potential to do better and achieve more than we may have realized or accomplished to this point.

Desire is a starting point. You must desire to be your best. A hunger for excellence is the attitude that precedes action and best begins to put one on the path to success. It is not a hunger that tramps on others to move one’s self forward. It is an attitude that causes you to measure yourself against yourself and your past achievements and improve upon those, daily, monthly, yearly, and consistently.

If a person is not reaching for excellence in what they do, if they do not believe they really can do better and achieve more and be willing to do what’s needed to make it happen, you can be assured they will probably reach a plateau and stay stuck there for the rest of their career … or life.

Men and women with an attitude of excellence are most apt to engage a personal and professional Coach to assist them in understanding themselves and identifying opportunities for moving forward with greater momentum. They want to identify blind spots and make needed adjustments so they can be their best at thinking, carrying out their day to day work and leading others.

Of course, simply having an attitude of excellence isn’t all that is needed to be successful. You need to be clear about where you are going, assemble skills and resources to get there and do the work necessary to realize your desired outcome. You need to realize open doors when they are in front of you and seek to open them when they are not.

But attitude is the driver. An attitude of excellence will keep you moving forward while others are settling for less than what is truly possible. An attitude of excellence will keep you positive when things look like they will never work out. An attitude of excellence will give your thinking and your actions momentum while others languish.

Never underestimate a right attitude. Attitudes of excellence can lift up a whole team and propel them forward. This type of attitude leads to breakthroughs where others see dead ends. It sees problems as one step closer to solutions.

An attitude of excellence does not settle for the status quo. It is attractive, expansive and forward moving. It is simply an attitude lived out, a driving force that has caused men and women throughout the ages to do better, achieve more and thrive.

Adopt this attitude. It has moved forward countless numbers of people who have achieved above and beyond what they originally might have thought they were capable of.

You don’t know what you have the capacity for until you reach for it. You don’t know what you are capable of achieving until you must or you choose to reach for it.

We all know people, who against great odds have done some pretty incredible things. Sometimes adversity created a context that meant they either reached for ‘the impossible’ or collapsed. Other times it was a conviction that they could reach some hitherto unattainable goal that drove them forward.

The point is, you just don’t know what you are capable of.

There are, however, some things we do know.

• You are capable of more than you think you are. If you are able to think, “I could never do it” then you are capable of thinking, “Maybe I can go a lot farther toward doing it than I previously thought.”
• If you don’t even try it is a ‘for sure’ that you won’t achieve it. In fact if you don’t try, you won’t achieve anything.
• If you do try, you will have the satisfaction, whether or not you ever achieve it, of having given it your best shot.
• Every small step achieved builds confidence. It provides proof that you can if you try. One step builds on another and leads to success.

When you achieve it, who knows what else you might actually be capable of. Maybe way, way beyond your previously small thinking.

So, what are you capable of? You don’t know. And I don’t know. But I can predict that you are capable of achieving far more than you currently think you can.

I think it is worth reviewing their observations in 2010 and I certainly recommend reading what they have written. As we are called on to provide effective leadership, each one of these traits is worth striving for.

1.    The Commitment Not to Lead a Little Life: If there is one trait that leaders share throughout history, it is the unshakeable commitment to live a life that matters.

2.    Vision: To lead others, leaders must have a destination in mind and be absolutely commited to making a vision come true.

3.    Voice: Armed with commitment and vision, leaders need a voice – a manner of communicating that others not only hear but also wish to follow.

4.    Heart: Leaders with heart are capable of inspiring others through example, whether this takes the form of incredible work ethic or a contagious passion.

5.    Team Building: To leave a lasting legacy many leaders build organizations that are not dependent on one person, but are self-sustaining entities in which people and processes work toward common goals.

6.    Backbone: There are times when mere talent and insight are not enough, and leaders have to summon unimaginable strength and internal fortitude to persist in the face of overwhelming obstacles.

7.    Listening: Real listening empowers leaders as it conveys the information needed to make wise decisions.

8.    Emotional Intelligence: By understanding and managing not only one’s own emotions, but also those of other people, leaders earn deserved respect, trust and confidence.

9.    Diversity: History, business and nature teach us that the surest way to survive – and thrive- over the long run is to foster diversity of thought, behavior and approach. Tomorrow’s leaders must master diversity.

Like me, you probably don’t feel like you are the epitome of all nine of these characteristics. But, along with many other traits that the leaders you respect show, these nine can challenge us to reach up and forward to be the best that we can be.

From time to time I am asked to speak to professional groups from the scriptures. Sometimes an entire audience will be made up of leaders who may be spending their day on topics of best practice and professional improvement.

The primary purpose of God’s Word is not to serve as a textbook to teach us about leadership and management. There is a wealth to be learned from the scriptures on those topics, to be sure and I’m happy to teach about it.

The primary purpose of God’s Word is to teach us God’s heart about relationship. God wants an intimate and growing relationship with people, including owners, entrepreneurs, executives and leaders. In giving his Son on the cross, God paid an unimaginable price to have you and me be in a right, intimate and growing relationship with Him. He wants our heart, not our professional curiosity.

If God has our heart, He can influence the way we manage people, advance vision and carry out our own personal work.  His transformative work challenges and changes our attitudes.

Out of understanding how valuable we are to God and how much he loves us and desires to form us and fellowship with us flow all sorts of implications for leaders and leadership.

You don’t have to wait until our paths intersect to hear me speaking about it. Seriously … crack open your own Bible and get reading. But if you haven’t done it for awhile, don’t first go looking for leadership principles. Go looking for relationship. It’s there you will find the heart of God.

Some leaders are wired to be bold, but they are hamstrung by politics and procrastination.

To unlock leadership paralysis and avoid mediocrity requires a different way of thinking … thinking that isn’t occupied with looking over its shoulder and watching its backside wondering what people will think and whether or not it’s ‘correct’ or good for your own future.

Executive boldness puts others at the center. It sees possibilities and a better future and goes for it. Boldness puts itself out there … on the line, going for what is best.

Five Starting Points

1. Make your own decision – Don’t be double minded, tossed here and there by every opinion expressed. Listen carefully. Do your analysis. Decide and stick to your decision.
2. Be willing to fail forward – Great achievements have been built on the learning experiences of failure. No leader has made significant gains without having first felt the sting of failure. But what they did different than most was embrace that failure as a stepping stone to the future. They got up and kept going.
3. Don’t analyze it to death – There is a time for everything, including moving forward. Some things can stay so long in the thinking stage that they simply die there. Or the time for them passes. Or interest is lost. Or the original vision blurred and put on the back burner. You get the idea. Once you have the essentials, act.
4. Stand out and stand up for something – If it’s an idea worth being out in the world, take a stand for it. Don’t be mamby pamby. Stand up and be counted. Cast your vision to any who will listen. As articulately as possible make your point in writing, in person and anywhere it will advance your idea.
5. Live above the level of mediocrity – Hum drum leadership abounds. Never, never settle for less than your absolute best. Aim for excellence in all you do. If it’s really that good, then you have products and initiatives in your head that need to be translated into reality. Ride the wave of excitement in giving life and leadership your best shot.

If we are going to unlock leadership paralysis and practice executive boldness in corporate, government, business or nonprofit, it will have to start with you and me. Now go out and find a Coach and talk about your next (or first) big bold move.

Growing professionally will happen in three ways:

1. The Individual Takes Charge – A self motivated leader steps up and develops their own executive learning and development plan. They take responsibility and exercise the discipline to see it through.
2. The Organization Mandates Growth – There is a clear path of expected growth and development generally tied to the desired outcomes of the organization.
3. The Individual Learns by the Seat of Their Pants – The leader does what needs doing, is generally swamped by responsibilities and projects. They pick up what they can when they need it. Learning occurs by dealing with fires and scrambling to assemble what’s needed for daily leadership.

Obviously the first two are more desirable. They will most surely be supplemented by the reality of number three. The vital questions are:

• Have you taken the initiative to develop your own learning and development plan?
• Have you as an organization understood and invested in the real growth of your people?
• Do you need to change something before your pants catch fire?

Everyone benefits from leaders and executives who are deliberate about growing and improving on the contribution they make.

Gather the Ideas: Make a list of those things which you consider priorities in your life right now. Never mind whether it seems doable or not, or whether it is just a dream at this point. It matters simply that it is a priority that you think about often.

Choose the Highest and Most Important: From this list, choose your number one highest priority, the one that you passionately want to see accomplished. (If you can follow this pattern with one priority, you can do it with any number of them.)

Understand What Needs to Happen: Take this high priority and write out all the things which will need to happen to bring it about. Don’t agonize over this list but be as thorough as you can, whether it’s five or one hundred ‘needs to happen’ items to realize success.

Break it Down to Three Definable Phases: From this list (of all the things that will need to happen) group sequential or closely related items into three clusters.

You now have three clusters of sub-points … the heart of a three part plan. Rearrange the sub-points according to some chronological time frame that allows you to address each point one by one.

Name each of these three groupings of sub-points (action steps) with brevity and in the clearest possible terms.

This is your blueprint for moving forward, your blueprint for success.

You now have a three step plan. Each step has been divided into sub-points or action steps that need to be accomplished, taken from your list of things that need to happen. Each step has a clear title indicating the main action or phase that all those sub-points are a part of.

Execute Your Plan: Execute this plan until you achieve your highest priority, no matter how long it takes.

Make Needed Adjustments: If and when you hit an insurmountable barrier, that you can absolutely determine is insurmountable, then make an adjustment to your plan or recognize and allow that that priority may not be achievable.

Never Give Up: Otherwise never, never, never give up on it, if you truly believe it is of the highest priority.

Obviously some priorities will be achieved in a short period of time. The steps are clear and executable. Other priorities will take considerable time because of their scope and will require persistence, patience and continuous action.