One Trait of a Good Leader, Their Not-to-Do List

One trait of a good leader is their not-to-do list. Written or remembered,  the successful leader's not-to-do list saves them from a lot of stress and the potential for overload and burnout.

Great leaders know so well what they will say 'yes' to, that saying 'no' generally comes easy.

The not-to-do list allows us to create boundaries around out time and talents. It allows us to avoid being spread too thin. It prevents us from potentially slipping into attitudes that devalue others and depreciate ourselves.

Those leaders, executives, owners and professionals around us who we admire for really achieving good things, do not get involved in everything. They understand their limits and work within them. Whether they operate a successful business from home or run an international empire from the office with the commanding view, these men and women have clear boundaries.

Sometimes they tick people off when they say 'no' to a request. But they get things done ... the right things ... things that move causes, projects and programs forward. They appear to have a great ability to focus on those priorities that will best advance the ball.

"Today many are harming themselves through the temptation to do more than their limits will allow. Walking, running, and ambition are not necessarily unhealthy. Too much, however, is universally unhealthy. Overload is like that. The problem is not with the 'load'. The problem is with the 'over'. Richard Swenson, Margin, 1992, NavPress

We live surrounded by the cult-of-busy. People busily doing things, but achieving little, happy to have the bragging rights of being 'too busy' under the guise of complaining about work.

The leader ought not to live like this. Yes, you may be busy. Let's not kid ourselves. There is a lot on your plate. But your busy is directed and engaged. It is focused on priorities. It takes its energy from attending to those things which are most important and which when achieved will make the biggest impact.

Creating the First Draft of Your Not-to-Do List

• Answer this question, 'What matters?". Check last weeks to-do list against this question. Were you working on what matters? Did you achieve those few things that would make the biggest difference? Or did your time get chewed up with items of lesser importance? Or worse yet, frittered away?


• Write down those things which you are not prepared to do or which are simply not effective things for you to be doing. As a leader there are some key activities that you should be spending considerable time on and others that are just not the best use of your time.


• Think about how willing you are to allow other people to do what needs to be done. Can you let them take the responsibility? Possibly fail to get it as well done as you think you can do it? Deal with the consequences? In other words before you make your not-to-do list, think about your attitudes toward others and just how important you find yourself to be.


• Write the not-to-do list.

Possible Not-to-Do's. I will not:

• Say yes to every request for my presence at some function.


• Agree to sit on as many boards.


• Take my work home on these nights of the week.


• Allow that particular area to run understaffed, causing pressure on me.


• Agree to as many conference calls.


• OK so many meetings that require my involvement.


• Agree to speak as often in places that involve considerable travel.


• Allow interruptions during my most productive hours.


• Agree to hear a problem without the person providing a potential solution.


• Stay any longer in an area than 10 years.


• Try to troubleshoot technical problems myself.


• Accept the invitation to long lunches.

You get the idea. See how you do with your list. And then execute it with intention and focus. As you work with your personal coach, develop your personal not-to-do list. Let it guide you as you become increasingly more effective.

As an executive coach working with leaders, it is important for me to assist my clients in being more effective and productive. The not-to-do list is a simple lifelong tool, probably underestimated, that can make a big difference in seeing real, measurable improvement in that very same effectiveness and productivity.

Decision Making Influenced by Dopamine Levels?

Decision making is influenced by dopamine levels.

So reports an interesting January 8th article from the BBC News on a study at the Wellcome Trust Centre for Neuro-imaging at UCL.

Study lead, Dr Tali Sharot noted, "Our results indicate that when we consider alternative options when making real-life decisions, dopamine has a role in signalling the expected pleasure from those possible future events." The doctor went on to say, "We then use that signal to make our choices."



In that same article, Professor John Maule who works at Leeds University Business School on decision making, noted that "... in recent years people had begun to realise emotional or "gut instinct" decision making was just as important in human choices as analytical decision making."

In my thinking this translates ... we analyze all the facts but decisions are often made largely on feelings.

We have a gut instinct, a sense of whether or not something is going to be pleasurable and to what degree, a sense very early on of whether or not it might be 'for us' or not. We feel it deep down. Either that is affected by dopamine levels or it creates them which then get translated through the wonder of our whole person into decision making.

Interesting. Since it is out of my professional depth, I'll only fall back on what I do know for sure. Truly, we are "fearfully and wonderfully made", Psalm 139:14 The Bible.

9 Common Traits of History's Most Effective Leaders

There are 9 common traits of history's most effective leaders. This according to Charles A. Tribbett III, Andrea Redmond, and Bruce Kasanoff, authors of the 2004 book, Business Evolves, Leadership Endures.

I think it is worth reviewing their observations in 2010 and I certainly recommend reading what they have written. As we are called on to provide effective leadership, each one of these traits is worth striving for.

1.    The Commitment Not to Lead a Little Life: If there is one trait that leaders share throughout history, it is the unshakeable commitment to live a life that matters.

2.    Vision: To lead others, leaders must have a destination in mind and be absolutely commited to making a vision come true.

3.    Voice: Armed with commitment and vision, leaders need a voice – a manner of communicating that others not only hear but also wish to follow.

4.    Heart: Leaders with heart are capable of inspiring others through example, whether this takes the form of incredible work ethic or a contagious passion.

5.    Team Building: To leave a lasting legacy many leaders build organizations that are not dependent on one person, but are self-sustaining entities in which people and processes work toward common goals.

6.    Backbone: There are times when mere talent and insight are not enough, and leaders have to summon unimaginable strength and internal fortitude to persist in the face of overwhelming obstacles.

7.    Listening: Real listening empowers leaders as it conveys the information needed to make wise decisions.

8.    Emotional Intelligence: By understanding and managing not only one’s own emotions, but also those of other people, leaders earn deserved respect, trust and confidence.

9.    Diversity: History, business and nature teach us that the surest way to survive – and thrive- over the long run is to foster diversity of thought, behavior and approach. Tomorrow’s leaders must master diversity.

Like me, you probably don't feel like you are the epitome of all nine of these characteristics. But, along with many other traits that the leaders you respect show, these nine can challenge us to reach up and forward to be the best that we can be.

Ministry Burnout - Leaders Going Beyond Their Assignment

There is a common thread to much ministry burnout and it is leaders going above and beyond their original assignment.

You take a Christian worker who loves the Lord, and has high expectations of 'what God will do'. Make them a key decision maker carrying major responsibilities. They will prove themselves highly committed, heavily involved and willing to take on a demanding workload.

They will also, with great regularity, ratchet up.

Ratcheting up simply means you take the assignment (.. as the Lord has assigned to each his task. 1 Corinthians 3:5) you are sure 'God has given you' and you add to it. In this one area discernment often seems to be neglected.

While working you also see something else worthwhile to be done. You add it to your to-do list. You see a need here and a cause there to be addressed. Few step forward to help. And you do it ... and do it ... and do it.

Pretty soon you are doing more than the original assignment. You have 'ratcheted up.' And you may be on your way to ministry burnout and the signs of career burnout that are so common to any leader who is experiencing significant stress.

You become resentful of the task and critical of the people who have not volunteered. A gnawing ache develops in your gut and unwanted attitudes invade your thinking.

The cure? Know so well what you 'have been called to do', that saying 'No' to what you have not been called to do will be much easier.

In other words, know your priorities so well, that you say 'No' to those requests, no matter how good they are, that are not absolutely yours to accomplish. (If it isn't an absolute yes, it's a no.)

This is not to take away from doing what you have been assigned with excellence. Excellence is about depth not quantity.

Saying 'no' may allow others to step up and take responsibility, giving them the joy of seeing good things happen that are attached to their efforts and faith.

If the priorities and assignments all seem to blend into one and you find it difficult to sort them out, you may need to work with a life or leadership Coach for a period of time to gain some perspective.

Many people have been robbed of useful service because other well meaning Christians, most often leaders, have taken the task to themselves. If it is important, then God has prepared or is preparing the worker.

You are not the solution to every need.

Decision Making Questions Leaders Should Ask BEFORE Agreeing to Serve

Over several years, I have developed 14 decision making questions leaders should ask BEFORE agreeing to serve in any capacity, paid or voluntary, business or nonprofit.

As my coaching clients have spent time with the questions and their answers, good decisions have been made.

Here are a ten of the fourteen questions. If you are being asked to assume responsibility, whether it be a promotion, new company or new leadership role, take the time to sit down with a piece of paper and a pen and write out your answers. That way you will be very intentional and capture your thoughts concisely. This will enable you to make a better decision about your future.

1. Am I really committed to this cause and the people it represents? If you are not, don't put yourself or them through the pain. Those who take ownership will put their all into it and stand a far better chance of success.


2. Do I have confidence in the senior leadership and feel I can support them? If any doubt lingers about the senior leadership, deal with the questions now. You will have a lot to do with them and your current inkling may end up your lengthy headache ... or worse.


3. Can I make the time for this leadership responsibility without creating excessive stress? In reality, how much time do you think this will take? Knowing your own style, will you allow it to consume your time to an unhealthy degree. Preemptive action may be necessary.


4. Do I and my spouse agree about this decision? If you don't ... don't. If you enjoy a good relationship with your spouse, they are your first line of defense in making a good decision. They know you, care about what happens to you and how it will impact the family.


5. Leadership issues take discernment. Am I a discerning person and can I improve that competency? Some leadership positions require real wisdom. There are tricky issues to deal with. If that's not you, then say no. If you are willing to grow in this area, then move forward humbly and open to learn.


6. Do I have any hidden agenda that could sabotage meetings or others on my team? If being in this role is all about you, your agenda may be the unspoken problem in every meeting. Deal with that stuff now, not later. Be up front about truth.


7. Are there any continuing things in my life that if people knew about them would disqualify me from serving? Get those things cleaned up now. Don't live with guilt and the fear of being 'found out'. Failures are not final. Learning from them is priceless.


8. Am I a good team player or do I generally want my own way? The organization is headed for trouble with a dictator at the helm. If you see yourself as the great ruler, get down off your pedestal. Learn how to work with the team. Provide great leadership and you will garner the respect that can dramatically move things forward.


9. How have I been prepared for this task? Experience, skills, interests? Simple question with big importance. What has brought you to this point? The sum total of who you are will determine where you go and how you lead the organization or project forward.


10. To what degree am I willing to change so that I can make a more effective contribution? There's the rub. Are you willing to change? Those who are intentional about looking hard at themselves and making real personal and professional change, move forward. Others languish at the level of their refusal to do what's needed to reach up to their potential.